The 'back to school felling'! I feel that no matter your age, the back to school slog can always become more of an obstacle then you ever thought.
The blogging has been my nemesis for some time, the compatibility with 'it' and myself has yet to happen. The performance aspect of this course I guess is the publishing of the material I am working on, as opposed to the work I am producing to the note books (is this part the rehearsals?) .The longer things are left for further thought, the bigger the build up of anxiety and pressure associates to the challenge...this is where I am ashamed to say I am...once again. Thanks to Paula and our recent phonecall I have had the chance to narrow down my thoughts and ideas in to a more managable bite size format.
Attempting to identify the path and direction my inquiry is to head down has opened an enormous vat full of interesting questions that are in my head. Some are leading questions that lie within my day to day practice, some are what will further shape me personal development path, some are what could be explored within my inquiry to develop my understanding of professional practice. Now, how to identify which category they belong in?
I know that in my current practice I am undergoing a transition from performing to teaching. Within this area I am constantly coming across questions and possibilities that I need to understand...are these the questions I want to use for the inquiry or is there a way of leaving these for the inevitable daily exploration?
The two paths; uni inquiry and the career perormance/teaching transition, run parallel to one another with a great deal of overlap (which seems obvious as this is where my life is at the moment, both professional and educationally). I think what I am trying to say is that there will be some questions that with time will come to a natural conclusion or that I will answer for my self, supporting the study for BAPP. Yet there are some of which I wish to take solely as an investigation, that possibly require some in depth further understanding...where the outcome is unknown to me. Exciting and nerve racking at the same time.
The way I think I will tackle this is to look at the performing/teacher part of 'me' as an observation of 'someone'...what is this person actively doing? how is she doing this? what is it she is doing? is she doing this due to her choices or as a result of circumstance?
The separation between the doing and the thinking should help to give clarity from the external, objective approach to me!!
I will set a separate blog for the questions that I have up to today and hope that with further discussions with Paula and others in the course and within my SIG (once fully established) I can successfully accept and refuse the ones that are appropriate for attention with in the inquiry.
I would be interested in hearing if anyone else has come across a problem like me. Is your inquiry really closely linked to your daily work...or have you chosen a completely different path (however still related to your field) to investigate? Is working on an idea for the inquiry, that is being 'lived' in the moment a good or bad choice...with respects to dividing the bias of what we want to hear and achieve? Are you able to separate the questions you wish to persue to the ones that you know you will face, without them being tainted?
Looking at this, maybe I am thinking too much about instead of trial and error?
QUESTIONS PROVOKED BY QUESTIONS ANSWERED BY QUESTIONS THAT LEAD TO FURTHER QUESTIONS!!!!!
